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sharia law now mandatory, finally

La Liga Luchador vs. AJ "Boxy" Brown Welp, not really sure how to put this into words so I'll let a picture give you roughly a thousand of them: I don't need to get too deeply into how much it totally sucks to be

Shut up, Wesley.

Welp. It was a pretty fuckin nice week off! Almost too nice. In case all of you were wondering, Vermont was pretty god damn spectacular. Yeah sure, we missed the peak season, but we did beat stick season and was able to enjoy leaves of every shade of gold. Now,

Truck it, don't track it

Let's just jump right the fuck in, [W] My guys [L] darnold's pizza kitchen You know. These things would probably be a lot easier to write if I took at least one fucking gander at them during the actual NFL sunday slate. I usually just have

I'm a victim of circumstance

Colts vs Commies Mariota goes down, which makes way for the Grecian Sensacian - Throwdysseus. Patriots vs Bills Pardon me, I need to first get this out, Oh wait, not sure if I've fully made my point, I can't fucking believe we pulled it off again. Although

Now Banned from Performing at Gillette Stadium

Recaps Welcome back, my dudes (and dudette). Not a bad showing from everyone, including those pesky NFL teams (except the greatest of them all - the Patriots). With the abysmal failing of my personal favorite baseball team at the hands of their hated rival, all I want is to be excited

Regretfully quitting the Ed Sheeran US tour

Welp. Another week, and another fucking column that comes out the day after the next week starts. Tough shit you fuckers. You'll be lucky to get jokes that aren't just copied from Twitter and shoehorned into recaps that don't even include the specific player.

As seen at the Kennedy Center!

Welcome back, ladies and germs. It's 2026, and the time is nigh for a new fuckin season of Fantastical Football! Hopefully everyone has done their proper preparatory work and prayed to whatever deity or substation they needed to prior to the draft because y'all are fucked

It's Doug Flutonian's world, and we're just living in it

Christmas Cowboys I heard somewhere that the fucking Commanders have had eight total standalone games. What an absolute fuckin dumpster fire of a god damn schedule. Jayden gets hurt, and it surprisingly turns out that this Washington team fucking sucks. ..but not as much as being a Washington fan. Holy

Merry Christmas you filthy animals

What the fuck, imgur So the free service I totally take advantage of in order to share bullshittery and memery with all you assholes is completely fucking me over right now. I can't upload any videos to it anymore - and as you all know, moving pictures are the

pee pee poo poo

OK. Well. A lot of shit happened over the last week: Football for four straight days (or three out of four for folks like myself who don't really care all that much about amateurs). At least one Thanksgiving-related celebration. Winter storm on Tuesday. And any child-borne

In memory of Gobbles

Texans rustle some Bluecows ok google, show me an image that describes the Buffalo Bills' Super Bowl window, Chi-town Steamers Steelers Steelers waking up on Monday checking the standings, Haha, get fucked Steeltown Chi-town? You're one fuckin win away from the #1 seed in the

These are hard to come up with

The Greatriots Rise INSUFFERABLE LEVELS ARE RISING TO UNSUSTAINABLE LEVELS 🔊 has sound 🔊 Let's fuckin gooooo. A little messy of a game, but who doesn't enjoy a little slop?? A win is a win! ¡Dios Mio, Los Delfines! Me? Tune in to a 930am game to watch

Post that I might rename later

W (7-3) Shough It Dude Let's Go Poop L (2-8) Slava I Crain As much as I want to give this Shough It Dude bro shit and complain about how he's scored over 1400 fucking points while no other team has hit 1300,,, So

There's nothing wrong with having a tree as a friend

Sandy pigeons Let's start the season halfway point down in Sunny Mee-ah-mee where the Dolphins are doing their best impression of big fat honkin' boobahs in that they are made to absolutely suck. Tua Isuckallovah is back in rare extremely common form, playing like absolute